What the hell was I thinking?
Somehow, someway, I find myself matched up against a phalanx of eating machines, including somebody known as the Black Widow, in the professional division of Rouses World Crawfish Eating Championship this Saturday at French Quarter Fest.
Sonya Thomas, as the Black Widow is known to those unfortunate enough to compete against her, is a two-time winner of this event and the winner of the women’s division of the 2011 Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. She saves time by eating the shells.
My qualifications? A lifetime of peeling and eating, training at backyard boils for many years. Add to that a persistent willingness rush in where angels fear to tread and you pretty much have my total competitive profile.
This may not go well for me.
We’ll see. I concede nothing to the Widow or to any of the other challengers out there. I may sweep through this contest and discover a new avocation. There can’t be much better than one-upping the insurance salesman next to you at a cocktail party by letting the group know you’re a freaking competitive eater. I mean, how cool is that?
Pretty unlikely I’ll manage to outdo my formidable opponents. But what I will do is have a great time and find out just how fast I am. If you want to cheer me on, or just laugh at my stupidity for getting myself into this, I’d love to see you. The crustacean conflagration goes down at 1:30pm this Saturday on the Barracks Street side of the Mint. Practice up on our competitive eating smack talk and don’t be afraid to heckle the Black Widow. I could use all the help I can get!